Game Night - Akatsuki
by mysticaldragon11
Summary: Konan devises a thing called game night to get some Yaoi fangirl action. Everytime has failed so far. But tonight she gets more than she bargained for! Funny oneshot!


Itachi sat at the table sucking on a dango. He watched the blonde rub the same piece of clay between his fingers, over and over for the past half hour. He often wondered what the blonde thought about when he was moulding his clay. He of course would never ask. He didn't want the blonde or anyone else for that matter to know that he had a thing for the blonde. No way in the history of never would he say it. Nope he was content to just sit back and watch the blonde in his every move.

Deidara sat at the table boredly moulding the same piece of clay again and again, only to smash it and start over. It didn't help that Itachi kept staring intently at him and sucking on that damn dango. He wondered what other uses that mouth could be used for. With that, his groin gave a painful throb. 'Great Itachi you damn bastard. Why do you have to look so damn sexy?' He shifted in his seat and tried to hide the blush that had krept up on his cheeks.

Thank god at that moment Konan had come in and decided to start a conversation. "Deidara, when is Sasori due back from his mission?"

"Um I think tomorrow, un." He said shrugging bordely.

"Do you think he'll play cards on game night?" She asked grinning.

"Sasori Danna? Are you kidding, un? He'll probably play with his puppets." He laughed. If he knew anything about his partner it was that he spent every second on those puppets, he called art.

"You're probably right" She said.

"What about Kisame, Itachi? She asked the raven haired male.

He shrugged and said "Who knows?"

Itachi was never one to speak a whole lot. This time was no exception.

"Is he due back tomorrow too?" She asked.

"Yes" was the raven's only response.

"Hm, what about you two? Are you playing?" She asked hopefully.

"Yes" said Itachi. "No, un" Deidara said shaking his head. He had learned his lesson the hard way.

"Oh, but you have to." She whined.

"Nope, I am never playing strip poker with you fuckers again, un."

Konan sat looking disappointed with a pout on her lips. "Come on Dei-kun, please? We all need a hot blonde to look at." She smiled deviously.

He looked at his best friend and glared. "You are really mean Konan yeah." She nodded and continued begging.

"Fine I'll play if it will shut you up, un." He said throwing his hands in the air.

Itachi gave a silent thank you to Konan and all of her persistant begging. He too wanted to see the blonde in all his hot naked glory.

2 Days later

Everyone was back from their missions and noone had been sent on any new ones. Which made a very happy Konan. Noone knew this but Konan believed this game was created for two purposes. 1) She could see all of the hot Akatsuki guys naked. 2) To make the guys all fall for eachother, therefore creating a yaoi fangirls wildest fantacies come true.

Everyone else just asumed it was for fun. But Konan had a plan to get these guys together, and she would stop at nothing until her self proclaimed mission was complete. So far it had backfired everytime. But this time she had a secret weapon. ALCOHOL. Yep she was going to make it interesting on top of hot. Her nose began gushing blood as her mind began putting together all of the possiblities. 'This is going to be fun.' She thought to herself.

2 Hours In

The odds for a coupling tonight seemed to be good. Zetsu was down to nothing and Kisame was in the plant mans lap. Sure they were wasted but, WHO CARES? It was hot. They seemed to really be enjoying themselves, as Zetsu whispered something to Kisame making him blush rather hard. They got up and left the room.

Konan gave a silent cheer at her success so far.

Madara stood up and removed his boxers and blushed as he caught Sasori staring hungrily at him. Sasori hadn't played as predicted, but had gotten quite drunk and began shouting out what everyone was holding in their hands. Now he staggard over to Madara and placed a sloppy kiss on his mouth. Konan, grabbing tissues, couldn't believe her luck.

7 Hours In

Deidara was stripped totally and was sitting on the couch. Itachi was in his boxers but had given up on the game to go and molest the hot blonde.

9 Hours In

Light streamed through the window as Deidara opened his eyes. "Wow, yeah."

He moaned as pain shot through his head. He sat up and looked around not knowing where he was. Slowly realization set in. He was in Itachi's room, in Itachi's bed and he was naked. "Great, yeah." He grumbled. That's when it dawned on him that the shower was running. With lightning speed he jumped out of bed and ran out of the room. He shot into his and Sasori's room and stopped dead in his tracks.

Sasori and Madara lay in a tangled heap in his bed. "Why my bed, yeah?" He grumbled. He dashed to his dresser and got dressed quickly, leaving the room quietly so as not to wake Sasori or Madara.

Downstairs

Deidara entered the living room getting a good look around. "What a mess" he mumbled. The t.v. was on the radio was on, couch cushions were strewn everywhere, cards lay scattered and cups, shotglasses, empty liquor bottles cluttered just about every available table in the room.

He picked up a couch cushion and threw it out of the way. It landed, and an "ooph" could be heard a second after it landed. He walked over to the couch and moved the cushion. Pein lay face down on the couch. "Leader-sama?" He asked not believing his eyes. The Ex-Ame nin looked up at Deidara and the blonde very nearly laughed hysterically. Which he would have, had this not been his leader and two his head hurt badly.

Written all over the leader's face in permanant marker it read I was beaten by Konan. The leader sat up and Deidara did snicker. The leader was naked and it wasn't just his face that had suffered the red script, but his whole body as well. Also attached to the end of his cock was a bright pink oragami flower. He looked down where Deidara was staring and blushed hard. He grabbed a discarded cloak from the floor and swiftly put it on and shouted "KONAN!" Making haste in finding the blue haired deviant.

Deidara made his way into the kitchen. The sight before him was one of shock and utter surprise. On the kitchen table lay a naked Kakuzu and Hidan, both covered in chocolate syrup and whipped creme. On the counter however was Itachi himself. Deidara blinked a couple of times to make sure he wasn't hallucinating.

"How the hell did you get down here so fast, yeah?" He asked in a shaky almost panicky voice.

Itachi only looked amused. He loved the way the blonde was almost hysterical. He knew why too. But he couldn't help it. He had to play with the blonde's mind.

"Hocus pocus" Itachi said smirking.

"What, yeah?" asked the blonde looking confused.

It finally registered that he must have came down when he was in his own room getting dressed. He sighed and climbed onto the counter next to Itachi.

"Did we?" Deidara asked as a blush krept onto his cheeks.

"Did we what?" Itachi asked smirking.

"You know, yeah." He said as he stared at the floor.

"No I don't know." He whispered in Deidara's ear making him shiver.

"Did we have sex, yeah?" The blonde asked impatiently.

"If I said yes, what would you say? Asked Itachi eyeing the blonde.

"I would say we should do it again when I can remember it, yeah." Deidara said looking at Itachi shyly.

"But what if I said we didn't?" The raven said with a grin.

"Then I would say that we should, yeah." As he leaned in and captured Itachi's lips with his own.

They broke for air, panting slightly. "Itachi?"

"Yeah?"

"Did we? yeah?"

"Maybe"

"No seriously, un."

"I am serious"

"Did we, yeah?"

"No"

"Oh okay, yeah"

"......."

"Are you lying, yeah?"

"Maybe"

"Itachi, yeah!"

"Let's go upstairs and do it and then we can say that we did. " Itachi said suggestively.

"Oh my god, un. You don't know if we did either, do you?"

"Not a clue" Itachi shrugged.

He jumped off the counter and scooped up the blonde. Weather they did or didn't, it was going to be fun doing it anyway.


End file.
